The Gabby Bernstein (and 6 other people you need in your corner)
Last night I met Gabby Bernstein for the very first time, at my grandma’s house.
Okay so it happened in a dream, but it was ON POINT.
In real life, I had just spent 2 days in Sydney at the annual Hay House Writer’s Workshop, and to say that I walked away inspired and excited to write my very first book proposal would be the understatement of the year. The century even.
So I’m not entirely surprised that Gabby and I rendezvoused at Grandma’s to have a chat before my first public speaking event – about my book that had just been published.
Grandma was always my biggest advocate, and she loved and supported me and my dreams unconditionally. I have also long looked up to Gabby, and aspired to be as courageous and inspiring in my writing and helping my tribe as she is with hers.
The thing is, it was more than just a chat; this dream signaled a new phase in my life.
The phase where instead of relying on others to validate me, dictate whether I am lovable and what my value is, I now love myself unconditionally and chase my dreams with the abandon and passion that I had as an innocent child.
This is the phase where my tribe evolves and expands with people who genuinely have my back; in fact, where the whole universe has my back (see what I did there, Gabby).
Knowing who has my back means that I also know who my ‘advisory panel’ is now – the people I go to for counsel when I come up against the big decisions. I have the objective and subjective, friends, mentors, past colleagues, and paid professionals in this panel, and when I listen to my intuition, I know who to ask for help and when.
Being clear about who is in your advisory panel, and what role (or roles) they play, allows you to ask the right person for the right support at the right time. Would you go to your mechanic to cut your hair? Probably not (though there may be some multi-talented mechanics out there).
Here’s who I have in my panel:
- The Cheerleader
I know the people, like Grandma was, who are my advocates and cheerleaders – they see the real me, they see my potential, they encourage me, sing my praises, and love me whether I succeed or fail at my latest adventure. - The Black Hat*
I also have people who show me tough love when I need it, who critique my work and ideas, and help me pull in the reigns – often saving my bacon when I’m trying to do everything at once.* If you haven’t heard of Edward De Bono’s hats (including the Black Hat), you can find out more here. - The Mentor
Your mentor – whether you have a formal or informal mentoring relationship – is someone that you turn to for advice when you want to hear from one of your tribe who has been through what you’re going through. They are someone who inspires you, and is willing to share their experiences with you in order to help shape your own choices. - The Sponsor
This person is often also a cheerleader and/or mentor, but the difference is that they go out of their way to open doors for you. They connect you with the right people, the right situations, and start the right conversations for you. - The Colleague
The current or former colleague can be fantastic for a reality check on how you actually present in the workplace, how you are perceived by your peers/boss/team, and what they think your personal brand is. - The Pace Setter
This person is particularly crucial if you are a procrastinator, but is important for anyone who needs to get things done – and quickly! They set the pace, keep you on track, and keep you motivated when things get tough. - The Gabby Bernstein
As much as I admire and look up to Gabby, her role in my dream was to calm me down before the public speaking event. I have others in my life who calm me down by making me laugh (snort-laughs are my personal favourite), who remind me of what my priorities are, and who help me refocus (and not take myself too seriously).
Listen to your intuition when you’re selecting who is on your advisory panel – not everyone can be on the panel, and that’s okay. Think about who has helped you come through tough situations in the past, who celebrates your wins with you, who gives honest and constructive feedback/advice, who you would call (or would call you) in a crisis, and who can separate their personal judgement from their advice so that you can be your best self – these are the people who are in your corner.
Gabby and Grandma were both in my dream to show me that I’m on the right path, and my advisory panel is in place. So I hear you Universe, and I thank you.
PS. Gather around Gabby, Grandma, Advisory Panel, Universe – I’m totally ready for the book deal and those public speaking events xx
Note: Gabby Bernstein is a motivational speaker, life coach and author – you can learn more about her and her latest book, ’The Universe Has Your Back’ here.
